This last week was the official start of the holiday season. My calendar is already filling up and I am sure there will be much more to come. It will be hard to keep up.
As far as my house is concerned, I am already far, far behind.
I looked around my house at the beginning of this new week and was pretty discouraged by what I saw. There were clean clothes all over the TV room, my kitchen counters were covered in mail and other such papers, the floor under my table hasn’t been swept in… I can’t even remember. My guest bathroom has 4 towels draped all over it; and my make up, blow dryer and hair straightener are all over the counter. My daughter has been filling her water cup in that bathroom so there is constantly water on the floor. My carpet badly needs vacuuming, and the list could keep going, and going, and going. Like the Energizer Bunny.
It’s hard to keep up with the house work! I know that I should be having my children learn to do chores and help me out, and I do. But the things that those age-appropriate-chore charts don’t tell you is that it is just as much work to get your pre-schooler to do it as it is to just do it yourself.
To help take some pressure off myself, I have compiled a list of reasons why my house should look perfect. And then I have proceeded to debunk them. Here they are in no particular order.
1- Someone might come over and see it. Yes, someone might come over and see my house in all of it’s glorious, messy, lived-in state. And yes, they might judge me. But if their house is cleaner than mine, and they feel better about how their home looks after seeing mine, then I have succeeded in boosting their confidence! I have indirectly given them a compliment. And I can pat myself on the back for that. 🙂
2- Doctrine and Covenants 88:119– “Organize yourselves; prepare every needful thing; and establish a house,… a house of order, a house of God. I have sat through many a lesson or church talk (aka: guilt trip) about getting my house organized, clean, and in order. And I want to. I really do. But I think there is another way to interpret the words of the Lord here. Our house also needs order in priorities. Sometimes there are things that are just more important than a house devoid of dirt and clutter. This last week for instance, getting ready for Halloween, and going to parties, and service projects, and bridal showers just took precedence.
Linda S. Reeves said, “The only things that really need to be accomplished in the home are daily scripture study and prayer and weekly family home evening.” So, no matter what my house looks like, as long as those things got done my day was a success.
3- I’m a better Mom when my house is clean. I can’t really debunk this one because it is true. My mood and my patience are directly connected to the state of my house. The worse my house gets, the worse I get. And that mountain of laundry buries my happiness like nothing else can!
But, the more obsessed I get with making my house perfect, the more distracted I become. I miss out on opportunities to clean and talk and play with my kids.
My home doesn’t have to be prefect for me to enjoy my kids and to live my life. I just have to give up the illusion that in a household of six people (4 of which are under the age of 6) everything will have a place, and be in it’s place. That I can always keep horizontal surfaces clutterless and dust free. That my walls will have no fingerprints. Floors will have no crumbs And my bathrooms will always be sanitary.
I could probably have a picturesque house if I put the time in. But where would I find that time? I’d probably have to steal some from play time, and craft time, and nap time, and snuggle time, and book time, and party time, and service time.
For now, I’m not willing to do that.
The Lord said, “Man looketh on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh on the heart.” (1 Samuel 16:7)
The heart of my home is not how clean it is. It’s the love that’s here.
Thankfully, love doesn’t care what my house looks like.
Marie, go read this story on my blog– http://thoughtsnspots.blogspot.com/2014/05/no-need-to-feel-embarrassed.html Then realize that there actually can be good come from your house NOT being completely clean!
Excellent article. I will be facing some of these issues as well..